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UploaderKauter, avatar
TagsDungeons_and_Dragons, Fredrik_Andersson, Minotaur, Naga, centaur, dragon, sahaugin, werewolf
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Info900x652 // 273KB // jpg
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CM672: Yeah, if I was that boy I'd have a huge stupid-ass grin on my face too.
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ArthurPhilipDent: But why do the biggest girls look pissed?
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Anonymous1: Haters gonna hate
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Anonymous2: wow thats alot of kids.....bet all those ladies aren't too happy to find out that haha xD
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Anonymous3: oh lolz thats good
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Anonymous4: The upper left corner... Spyro XD
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Anonymous5: 6 wifes 1 husband and a whole mess a Bitchin
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Anonymous6: Some of the kids make you pedo-furry.
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Anonymous7(6): And I foresee incest.
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Kauter: heauheuheauheau
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Anonymous8: He's obviously a bard, what did you expect?
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ivy: I wish I was in his place so much
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Chef_Retardee: Hope he can bluff his way out of this one.
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MrAnon: I'd take care of em.
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Anonymous9: wow sucks to be him hmm and it seems he prone to daughters sence i only see one son well at least 2 of the moms arent angry looks like they may become close and i dont even want to know how you do a dragon
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Anonymous10: The two women on the far right are totally in to each other.
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Anonymous11: I totally want to hear him try to explain this one.
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Krawczyk: weird, I coulda sworn this was up already
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Anonymous12: I have a song it's called "look over there while I run for it!"

bard = suicide by the ladies
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Anonymous13(12): Who's gonna kill him first?
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Anonymous14(12): Anon9 you should ask "how do yo do most of those things and live."
how did he do all of them and live to this point is what I want to know
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Anonymous15: It's easy.
Step 1: Be a sexy. sexy bard.
Step 2: Seduce the ladies! Yeah!
Step 3: Be sure your co-adventurers have uncovered ridiculous amounts of loot, 'cause your share is going to have to support a *lot* of kids.

Bards are underestimated a lot.
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Anonymous16: So. . . how exactly was he able to produce offspring with all these creatures? That just wouldn't work.
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Anonymous17(15): A15: Oh, and I suppose you know all about werewolf and centaur reproduction, eh? Took a college course in it, perhaps? HMMMMM?

LOL. In a nutshell, the DM allowed it!
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Anonymous18(12): "Now remember kids only you can prevent wild fires so this dumbass can get laid with all the magical critters and get slautered later." LOL!!!1!

Don't care for spelling cuz this iz LOLZ!
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Anonymous19: well the kid seem happy
oh shit werewolf tits
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Anonymous20: Silly adventurer. You're supposed to SLAY the monsters. Not Lay the monsters!
=P
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Anonymous21: I think the werewolf mom look's the most pissed XD
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Anonymous22: I know I may be ruinin the fun, but maybe he's just an (unwilling by his face) babysitter. That would certainly explain the looks on the mother's faces. Plus babysitting's always a good way to score.
And are that scorpion and that centaur sexing each other up?
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Anonymous23(22): Oh Anon 15, you forget that everything in d&d can interbreed, and does, with frightening regularity.
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Anonymous24: He fucked all those big mommas and now all of ther offspring is in love with their own father!
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Anonymous25: DM did this for the lulz
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ThatsAkoolStoryBro: each kid is standing directly in front of its parent. theyre all a mixture of human and w/e species they came from.
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ThatsAkoolStoryBro: also........ family portrait.
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Anonymous26: One big happy family
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Urbane_Guerrilla: Now that is an adventurer! And the kids all have Daddy's hair.
Should he take up a day job as the postman?
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Urbane_Guerrilla: Or is it the UPS driver now?
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Anonymous27(26): Look at it closely and you will figure out why they are angry. You see the children really close to their father and probable have the same thoughts their mothers had. That's why they are so pissed off, but you have two exceptions with the women on the right. They are not angry because they are to busy paying attention to each other; see the red tail rapping around the Centaur. And the kids on the right are to busy fighting to notice thier father.
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Anonymous28: I'm pretty sure his orders were to slay the beasts... oh I see where the typo was
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Anonymous29: I can picture him roaming the land and falling in love (and latter having awesome sex) with the above females through a varity of situations (i.e. Saving the werewolf from a monster and nursing her back to health). But he does not see the long term and when he finally gets back home, he finds out that he had impregnated all of them (the dragon shapeshifted for the sex for the record), but not wanting to kill the man who gave them children (the werewolf would probably except it most easily considering how alphas act and such) decide to give him a chance, and that's where book one ends. Please comment if you liked this.
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Anonymous30: ... interesting idea but now can you put it into a story and post it? (preferably on AFF.net)
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Anonymous31(29): Anon 30 I'm glad you liked it but I don't have a AFF acount, heck, I don't even have a ff acount I just wanted to throw in some plot. By the way I came with the rest. Scorpion women- was her slave after being caught in the desert, but fell in love with him, centaur- childhood friend, dragon was his teacher in the arcane arts and fell in love with him, minator- either worked with her or was (un)lucky to find her in heat, and the naga found him washed up in her grotto, and was curious, for she had never met a human before. Please coment if like.
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Anonymous32: It's more a fully assembled family type thing by someone who knew about what was happening, probably the wizard/magician of the party, and who decided to be a total jerk about it, going to the mothers, telling them they need to know/see something, or maybe 'a free day at the beach for your children' thing, then 'porting them to the location of Lothario Loosepants, and are now enjoying the results. But they must of REALLY LIKED him because they look more annoyed/ disapproving than angry in a Rip-Your-Head-Off kind of way.
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Anonymous33(29): That would be a good explaniation for how they found him., but it would be better (in my opinion) that if the wizard hears moaning about missing them (he doesn't gear any names) so hoping to surprise his friend he casts a spell which brings the females + children to the catle/tower/ etc. So that bard would have to explain the situation to the peeved wizard as well as the angry females.
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Anonymous34: Geeze, you're supposed to slay the monsters, not lay them!
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Anonymous35: Bards-They get around.
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Anonymous36: This just proves my theory that while most species just don't mix humans seems to father/mother kids of everything physically possible.
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Anonymous37: The werewolf has more of a "you are SO going to pay for this, later on, in bed! Just you wait!" look on her face.
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Anonymous38: do the dragon regardless of consequences.
The bragging rights are worth it
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Anonymous39: Aaah now I see, he has a daughter/son with every of the adults. And they didn't knew... sucks to be him
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Anonymous40: In re the werewolf, he saved a party member from her by... distracting her. It's an earlier cartoon in the set. And for real fun, you should see the next cartoon in the set, wherein the elf in the adventuring party tries to neuter him, using the dwarven fighter's axe.
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Anonymous41: Lucky bastard...
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Anonymous42: That lucky son of a bitch! BTW the dragon girl is holding the minotaur chicks ass...
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Anonymous43: Ok I have to get all nerdy on everyone here, but it may help with future searching and tagging. There are no "sahaugins" in this picture, and it is spelled sahuagin. The scorpion chick I am sure is a creature from the book "Monsters of Faerun" called a Stinger. Or it could simply be what is known as a "tauric" creature (half human, half 4+ legged creature).
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Anonymous44: For the record I do have an explanation for this and might I add wizard, This is completely your fault
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Anonymous45: @ArthurPhilipDent: Cause this is the FIRST Family Picture, and, they're ALL just realized, "THEY WEREN'T the FIRST!
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Anonymous46(45): @Anonymous:@Anonymous:Even, DYING!? I don't think so! And, How You gonna brag, at a seance, by Quoiji Board?!
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Anonymous47(45): @Anonymous: Even, DYING?! I DON'T THINK SO!? And, How You gonna brag, by Quija Board, at a seance!?
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Anonymous48(45): @Anonymous: He mishead!
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Anonymous49(45): @Anonymous: Oh, "SLAY Them, Not "LAY" them! I misheard You, Sorry! Regardless, He's a BRAVE, Hornyassed Adventurer, nevertheless!
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Anonymous50: I think I fuigured it out the kid had sex with the bigger females and there all his kids
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Anonymous51: @Anonymous: Yeah, He was known to sing His way into their Hearts, and...Ahem)..."Other Places!" Oooooooooh, Yeeeaaaaah!
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Anonymous52: Dragon and the one creature under it the only ones i would sleep with.
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Anonymous53(52): Werewolf i mean
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Anonymous54: Werewolf, dragon, Minotaur or centaur, which shall it be? I'm having all four, and that boy well have the remaining two.
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Anonymous55: I saw this and rolled over laughing a naga, a dragon and a minator in the same family... no wonder they want him strung up by his balls, that there is a disaster waiting to happen. only the kids keep him alive... but not for long ;P
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Anonymous56: Anon 33, maybe you could add a twist where one of them is the wizard's assistant, and arranged this meeting as an act of vengeance on the little *ahem*knob who got into what the wizard figured should have been his. At the time, the (let's say the centaur, since in legends they're known for their wisdom) was also a slave to the wizard. In his travels, the adventurer found the centaur while she was out at the market going for some items from the shopkeeper. The adventurer decided to offer some assistance carrying some things, and since her load was especially heavy that day, (you've heard of the straw that broke the horses (or camel's) back?) she allowed him to help carry part of her load. On their way back to the wizard's castle, she explained how her servitude had happened, and since the traveler had collected a fair amount of money in his travels, he offered to pay her debt and free her, if the wizard would allow it. Upon arriving at the wizard's castle, the wizard demanded to know who the traveler was, and in an act of cunning, the traveler used enchanted gold coins to convince the wizard to sell his centaur to him. (You see, this wizard was only a mediocre one at best, and had only obtained the centaur through a wager that he had fixed.)
After being bought, the centaur gave the adventurer a ride on her back for three days, until they reached a safe distance away from the castle. Then, the adventurer declared the centaur to be free. She asked then what she could do to repay what she considered to be a debt. The adventurer at first said that he didn't want anything in return. (After all, she was the first one from the picture that he had. And by the look of his age, it very well could have been his first time... anyway...) So the centaur insisted, and said she wanted to give him a "special gift" in return for what he had done for her. And so they did what they did...
... Other stories may come... maybe...
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Anonymous57: atleat he went out with a bang.
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Anonymous58(57): sorry i meant to say atleast.
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Anonymous59: This is crazy shit this boy is having. Been a father having six wifves and six kids. How can he handle all twelve? Young adventurer, welcome to adulthood (clapping) welcome.
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Anonymous60: dragon kid is staring off into the middle distance like a retard lol.
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Anonymous61: And, I believe, some of You are misreading these expressions on the Mother's faces, any ways! Most of these creatures, GENERALLY LOOK PISSED OFF, anyway! 1. Anyone coming into their territory, is generally looked at as 1. intruder,/thief/Monster/Slayer 2. Anyone catching their interest otherwise, is looked on as interesting, and/or, fair game! 3. They've all come to the abrupt realization:"Damnit, I'm NOT the only one who thought He was Sexy, and/or, CUTE!"
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Anonymous62: Does that bear have boobs?
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Anonymous63: @Anonymous: I think what You're clalling a Bear, is, in fact, a Werewolf!
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Anonymous64: @CM672: Yeah, might as well...FOR THE FEW REMAINING SECONDS YOU MIGHT HAVE TO LIVE!
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Anonymous65(64): @Anonymous: I'm Guessing, Enchanted Instrument(Take You Pick, Y' pervs!), and, Natural Charisma, Intelligence(Seeing which way the wind was blowing, and, going with It), plus, being in the Right Place, at, the Right Time!
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Anonymous66(64): @Anonymous: Hey, it keeps Him on the Road, out of the House, and, Earning BeauCoup Bucks to support His numerous Children, and, Wives, at least In part! However, with this one meeting, NOW, all His Wives, with two possible exceptions, are gonna be wondering, whenever He's outta sight; "What, or Who, is He doing, NOW! That Horny Little Cutie!"
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Anonymous67: @Anonymous: How do You DO a Dagon? The Answer; "VERY CAREFULLY!"
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Anonymous68: For those unfamiliar with the artist's work (you may note that his name and webpage are at the bottom of the image), this is one of a series of gag pictures. The running joke is, "the Bard will have sex with anything."

Typical punchlines are "No, no, no. We hired you to SLAY the dragon, not LAY the dragon" and "how the hell did you manage to get a boulder pregnant?" (imagine Bard being followed by a smallish rock, with pigtails, that is saying "daddy! daddy!")

...also, of all of them, I only find the minotaur girl and the centaur especially fuckable, but that's just me.


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