Please read our Rules and continue to report content that violates our rules on underage content.
main image
- Reply
Titus: Man, I hate those things.
- Reply
Anonymous1: Can't wait for the next page. :)
- Reply
28512: Haha fuck you Lydia
avatar
- Reply
samus_aran: Tagged and sourced, If I missed anything please fill me in, I'm pretty bad at tagging as my rep goes.
- Reply
Anonymous2: The return!
- Reply
Anonymous3: Shoulda been Mjoll
- Reply
Anonymous4: these things are not sentient.....i thought this was supposed to be SENTIENT races not machines powered by steam.
avatar
- Reply
Silent_Witness: @Anonymous: If I remember right, I think that just applied to the Dragonborn.
- Reply
Anonymous5: Spells man.

Knowing the dragonborn, he went in a mystical quest given by a goddess of sex or anything, slayed tousands of strange monsters and finally received a magic book wich teached him about the Ways Of The Flesh (a mist spell from the Alteration and Illusion Scholls - good stuff for leveling both), or a Th´um or something.

Then, as a good Archmage, he simply cast it on the first thing he saw.
- Reply
Titus: @Silent_Witness: It also doesn't seem to be part of that comic.
- Reply
Anonymous6: @Silent_Witness: @Titus: never even considered those.....my apologies, i just assumed it would be in the comic since on his hentai foundry page he uploaded the akavir beings before the comic ever came out.
- Reply
Anonymous7: I don't want single pics I WANNA GODDAM COMIC
- Reply
Anonymous8: No Dwenmer gundam shit.
- Reply
Titus: @Anonymous: It's cool.
- Reply
Anonymous9(8): @Titus: Now, do you mean, like, 'it's alright' cool, or 'it's awesome' cool?
- Reply
Anonymous10: @Anonymous: you sir or madam are a moronic dumb shit. @Anonymous: you as well master anon7.....you both can suck it.
- Reply
Anonymous11(8): @Anonymous: Why you got why you got why you gotta be like that?
- Reply
Anonymous12: Dwarven Centurion? Mor like Dwarven fuckturion lol
- Reply
Anonymous13: I like it
you should do a whole rape comic of this
- Reply
Anonymous14: anon7 how about you CALM THE FUCK DOWN
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: "Dwarven".

It's Dwemer, dweeb.
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: This also directed at whoever came up with the idea of using "Dwarven" along with "Dwemer" without clearly...

Screw this, I'm not going to rant again.
avatar
- Reply
Rat: @Fara_Phoenix: Wise rodent once said; Let your rants flow out like bad diarrhea, then they will stop hurting from the inside.
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: @Fara_Phoenix: Dwarven refers to anything Dwemer made/influenced/etc... Dwemer are an ancient, extinct race of elves. I don't know what's wrong.

Yes, I know what the other kind of Dwarven is, but to simplify things, I always focus strictly on the lore.
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: @Franky_Whiskey: It's pretty much that: if an human makes it, it's a human device. If an elf makes it, it's an elven artifact. If a dwemer makes it, why the fuck is it dwarven?

I'll go back to grammar nazi-ing, at least there I won't have to rely on aesthetics.
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: @Fara_Phoenix: Dunmeri religion, Bosmeri archery, Aldmeri Dominion and Aldmeris. Despite being elves, they are different things owing their creation to an specific race. Because we have Dunmeri and Bosmeri religion, calling both elven faiths kinda mucks up the vast differences between both.

And since the Dwemer were the ONLY ones to create devices that almost didn't depend on magic hocus-pocus (yes, even the Hulking and Verminous fabricants from Sotha Sil are mostly magic-based), they deserve their machines to be named after their own race.

Otherwise, "Elven artifact" might pass as a shitty Bosmeri bow just as well as a fascinating Dwemeri puzzle box.
avatar
- Reply
Tetragrammaton: I wish I had more interests in these things, however my old laptop crashed and I ended up staying a vampire in oblivion and occupying myself in killing town guards, oh how I enjoyed sniping them from the roofs.
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: @Franky_Whiskey: That wasn't actually my point. My point was that the adjectives referring to a species or race are normally direct derivatives of the race's standard name.

And then along comes "dwarven".
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: @Fara_Phoenix: Gotta elaborate better next time then.

Well now then, to stop this short, Dwemer are justified in being called Dwarfs (making Dwarven shit) because they did all of their upmost to be completely different from any other race that ever set foot on Tamriel, perhaps even Mundus.

They were possibly atheistic, relied heavily on logic and science, and were incredibly curious about how it all worked, not just relying on some legends. Thus few of their many lulztastic achievments were pissing off Daedric lords, poking around the heart of a long-dead god, then creating reality-warping tools to power it up to create their own fucking artificial god. Not less impressive is the way they handled steam energy to create electricity and power up machines that still work after three millenniums, along with coming up with a metal so fucking awesome that doesn't rust; Those are pretty much the ingredients for making bad ass automatons. Did I mentioned they also used telepathy? To talk to each other? Yeah.

Not to forget that other races feared them greatly. So when they dissipated from this plane entirely, many didn't gave much of a damn while feeling relieved; those few that did were faced with valuable information written in a complicated-as-licking-King-Kong's-balls language, with an equally messed up alphabet. The only idiots who knew them kinda close where the Muslim Elves, and they came up with Dwarven, which probably means "virgin geek" in Old Ashlander. Which also kinda answers why the Dwemer had to kick their asses frequently.

So typical western researchers just added "mer" to the "Dwa" prefix. Effectively clumping a race so magnificent and different with a bunch on hillbilly magic-flinging' inbred elves. How Dwarves called themselves is a mystery so obscure not even Scooby-Doo and the gang can solve it. And they solve every fucking mystery they are faced with.

tl;dr Dwarven is a completely different animal, whitey comes and clumps em' with shit elves. Hence Dwarven and Dwemer. Same thing why we have two kinds of Indians.
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: @Franky_Whiskey: So the fact they're called dwarves is an ass-pull on the writers' part, as they were too lazy to give them a properly alien and unpronounceable name.

That I can live with.
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: @Fara_Phoenix: Yeah, let's go with that.

Surrisingly, they do go to great lenghts with the Khajiit language and history. Why would that be? hahaha!
avatar
- Reply
Tetragrammaton: @Franky_Whiskey: Furries. Maybe someone likes cats?
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: @Tetragrammaton: Indeed!
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: @Franky_Whiskey: I'm not sure I would like those particular cats, since the writers have also explained (The Real Barenziah, Daggerfall edition, chapter 4) that Khajiit got...correct penises, read: barbed ones.
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: @Fara_Phoenix:"Barbed penises. BIG, BARBED, penises!"

Seriously, tho, Barenziah did like it, didn't she? Besides, that's nothing a goat's-intestine-made condom can't fix.
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: @Franky_Whiskey: Assuming The Real Barenziah is at all canon-accurate. The way it's written (and intended to work in-universe, politically speaking) I'm fairly certain some parts are fabrication or artistic license.
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: @Fara_Phoenix: AKA fanfiction? Felt like it as soon as I read the "fuck a khajiit's barbed pingas in the middle of a thieve's den" part.

Still, pretty hawt for videogame lore. Beats 50 Shades of Cray.
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: @Franky_Whiskey: Well, from an in-universe perspective that book was a weapon, dramatized to be read by as many people as possible and including hot khajiit-on-dunmer secksings in order to raise a scandal around Barenziah.

No wonder it was censored.
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: @Fara_Phoenix: The book also revealed her shit childhood in Solitude and how much of a manipulative asshole Tiber Septim was. So I think she's actually glad the guy published it, as she protected him from the royal family and took him to Mournhold as one of her escorts. Maybe she did help him write the book, then feigned discontent while cheering inside.

Also, makes me wonder if she bumps uglies with him. She still has a good 400 years to go! Dunno about the him, though...
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: @Franky_Whiskey: Uh, must not get mental imagery.

Replacing with younger Barenziah and Therris in a sleazy bar.
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: @Fara_Phoenix: How 'bout khajiit Nerevarine and Jiub, a night before the game? "Oh, sure is stormy tonight, outlander..."
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: @Franky_Whiskey: Nah, Jiub is fugly.
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: @Fara_Phoenix: Can't please erryone, I guess, heh.
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: @Franky_Whiskey: Not really.

Hm, wait, speaking of him...is there really no Jiub on here?
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: @Fara_Phoenix: Nope. At lest we got some Anhassi!
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: @Franky_Whiskey: Still disappointingly little imo.
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: @Fara_Phoenix: share a gift, share a care?
avatar
- Reply
Fara_Phoenix: @Franky_Whiskey: Hm?
avatar
- Reply
Franky_Whiskey: Just quoting Ahnassi.

I would kill for a set of Daedric darts!
- Reply
Anonymous15: Dwarven Centurions: fucking you up in more ways than one.
avatar
- Reply
SpunkMaster69: @Titus:

Lydia used to, but she can't seem to remember why now for some reason.


Report an ad?